Review by Martha Quillen
Local Life – June 2007 – Colorado Central Magazine
That Crazy Lady Down the Road
by Judy Messoline
published by Earth Star Publications, 2005
ISBN 0-944851-14-2
THE CRAZY LADY DOWN THE ROAD by Judy Messoline, the founder and proprietor of the UFO Watchtower in the San Luis Valley, is about her unusual enterprise. I hoped it would be a fun and informative look at one of the Valley’s most unusual businesses — and it does start out that way. But unfortunately, half of this 250-page book consists of roughly transcribed accounts of UFO sightings collected from tower visitors, and many of them are jumbled and confusing.
For example, here are two excerpts from much longer accounts:
“It flew off to our left wing, which would have been, and a little bit in front of us, which would have been to the southwest from where we were flying. And then in a very quick manner, within the manner of three of four seconds, it had moved from, to our side to directly in front of us at about the distance of two to three miles in front of us, what we estimated.”
“And I looked towards Salida and the only way I’ve been able to describe it, was the first thing I saw was maybe if it was solid it was like a 8-foot pyramid. But it wasn’t solid, it was like vapor. Red, white, and green coming out of the ground. And I started to just… I fell where I was sitting, and I just started, heat my whole body, and it was just cold out. But I was just warm with the most intense divine love. And it, right away I thought of the divine mother. That’s all it reminded me of. The rainbow and the color, like the heart of the mother opening and pouring out this; you can’t touch me love. And I just… it just blew me away. It didn’t fit anything. It wasn’t a ship… you know. I just couldn’t: no mind stay there.” [Note: all ellipses in this excerpt were in the book.]
If you’ve seen UFOs in the Valley and want to know if anyone else has seen similar aberrations, you may want to scan these transcripts, but they are definitely not good reading.
Messoline’s story, on the other hand, is interesting. She writes about how she and her husband bought ranchland in the San Luis Valley, but subsequently had some bad luck with drought, irrigation water, and livestock, which led them to sell their herd. At that point, they needed to find some other way to hold on to their land. And so, Judy thought, why not build a UFO Watchtower?
And that’s what they did. The Messolines established a whole different kind of resort in our region — part natural attraction, part campground, part museum, part tourist business, part gift shop, and part alien information center. They erected a metal platform, with a shiny dome for the gift shop and began supplying the place with plastic aliens and rental binoculars.
It’s a fascinating idea, exotic, beguiling and funny, and it worked — at least partially. Reporters arrived, psychics came, and abductees gathered. Apparently, the financial rewards have been somewhat disappointing, but the tower has gleaned a measure of fame despite its relative lack of fortune. It has also earned high praise from true believers.
According to Messoline, psychics told her: “Do you realize that you were led to this? You have been chosen to familiarize the public about UFOs and aliens so that when they make their presence a reality, the people won’t panic.”
In the beginning, Messoline knew almost nothing about aliens, but gradually she was told all about the vortexes on her land which reportedly make it possible for the aliens to visit, and the healing nature of the watchtower’s garden, and the claims of Commander Sanni Ceto, the former pilot of one of the spacecraft which crashed at Roswell, who has been a featured speaker at the tower.
In fact, Messoline has come to believe in all of these things and more, and her book is very defensive about such beliefs — and critical about doubters and detractors. Messoline preaches acceptance and belief, and expresses exuberant enthusiasm about some of the most confoundingly surreal claims her customers advance. And that doubtlessly makes Judy Messoline the ideal UFO Tower proprietor. But it also made That Crazy Lady Down the Road a pretty uncomfortable read for me.
I figure our skies are full of crafts and lights and objects that people can’t identify. So its only natural that people report seeing them. And as I see it, perfectly normal people have bizarre and mystical experiences.
But I found myself getting a little worried about some of the people in Messoline’s book (especially those who said that they knew they’d been abducted repeatedly because they had found themselves losing consciousness and track of time over and over again). And I couldn’t help but wonder about the physical and mental health of the woman who claimed she’d gotten pregnant by aliens year after year, but they’d invariably taken her babies before they were born.
MESSOLINE IS IRRITATED by people who assume that purported aliens, alien experts, and abductees are liars or con artists. But fakery is not the worst-case scenario here. On the contrary, I found myself wondering whether a couple of the people in this book might not be afflicted with brain tumors, epilepsy, or schizophrenia. Although tolerance, acceptance and affirmation are admirable, in this case I think they’re a little over-rated. When it comes to believing people’s accounts of astonishing events, a little skepticism only seems wise.
If you are a true believer, or a New Age disciple, or as determinedly accepting as Judy Messoline, you may enjoy this book. But if you harbor any serious reservations about aliens, vortexes, or non-fictional abductee narratives, then The Crazy Lady Down the Road probably isn’t for you. It emphatically and energetically promotes questionable education about alien life forms, and thus some of its accounts and conclusions may even disturb you.
Yet Messoline comes off as humorous, cheerful, and as friendly as Mayberry’s Aunt Bea. And the tower itself (with its whimsical signage, fanciful offerings, and gift store full of colorful alien critters) sounds like an appealing attraction, even for doubters — although probably not during informative seminars.
For further information about the UFO Watchtower check www.ufowatchtower.com.
