By Mike Rosso
“Hello and welcome to MegaCorp. Para el Español presione por favor cinco. Please enter your ten-digit phone number, followed by the pound sign.”
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
“Thank you, the next available representative will be with you shortly.”
Five minutes of scratchy, cheery music at high volume.